My daughter is having an identity crises...

My lovely daughter seems to be having a very serious identity crises. She apparently categorizes all individuals into two types: city girl or country girl.

We abandoned our city ways and moved to the country, yet her father (whom she visits frequently) still lives in the big city of Edmonton. She struggles, the poor thing, with whether that makes her a city girl or a country girl? I dared to suggested that perhaps she is the rare exception, and is in fact an amalgamation of city AND country girl... I think her 7-year-old brain almost exploded trying to consolidate the two.

Example: A few weeks ago we enjoyed our FIRST EVER rodeo! (It was highly entertaining, I fully recommend going sometime, if only for the eye candy) And in classic "city girl" fashion she couldn't decide what to wear! For our first Christmas here, her new grandparents-in-law, in a show of infinite sweetness, bought her a pair of beautiful chaps (not sh-aps!), complete with tassels. Her first outfit choice consisted of those, a white bedazzeled cow girl hat (remnants of a halloween costume) a blue plaid button-up and probably her walmart brand crocs. She would have looked ridiculous and adorable all at the same time, but I think she was too uncomfortable. Like she wasn't quite country girl enough yet to fit the country girl look.

She ended up in an equally adorable, albeit excessively matchy, outfit of a black, florescent green, and pink maxi sundress, pink sparkly shoes, and a pink fedora.

I really wish I had a better picture of her outfit that day. She rocked it.

Currently, she is in Edmonton right now visiting her dad and it makes me wonder which identity she'll come home with? It was a long stint in between visits this time and I'm sure if you had asked her then, she would have probably said she was more country girl. After two weeks in the big city though....

It also makes me wonder where she comes up with these ideas? Why does a 7-year-old feel the need to restrict herself to a preordained label box? And why THOSE (rather specific) two labels? I've been very careful her whole life, especially now given our current family structure, to instill a strong understanding that everyone is different and no one personality or trait is wrong. Strange that this urge to define should surface now. Two years ago she was certain she was going to be Hannah Montana...

Yes, she is gorgeous, I know. Thank you. 

Look at those Pipes!

MOOOOOM DAAAYYYYY!!!

Once a month, a wonderful, beautiful, glorious day comes. It's called "Mom Day". No, not a monthly revisit of mothers day, or even breakfast in bed, or even wine in the afternoon (although that sometimes happens this holiest of days). It's a day, a WHOLE day, where the partner and I leave the all kidlets with dad and make the trek to the big city of Prince George to go shopping, all day, kid FREE!!

A 2.5 hour drive there full of adult conversation and adult radio stations, or simply the best thing ever, pure silence. Followed by leisurely meandering down racks of clothes with no little people pulling them off their hangers, or maybe a stroll through the mall, just to see whats new without someone proclaiming that they MUST HAVE! this shiny thing that makes lots of racket. No one to load in and out of the mini van except our own butts, no car seats, no snacks or diaper bag, no bathroom stops. Oh! and sweet, glorious S-t-a-r-b-u-c-k-s, droooool.

Today just happened to be one of these marvelous days. Actually it was a complete surprise! Normally we plan out mom day up to weeks in advance, figuring out exactly what we need and where to go, and picking out a new ethnic restaurant to try out because no one but us in our family appreciates food with flavour. But today just so happened to work out. The stars aligned. In our excitement we forgot pretty much everything that we typically take with us, including all our club cards. We even have a "Mom Binder" containing our itinerary, shopping lists, club cards, receipts etc. Nor did we empty out the van in order to fold down the seats to make room for all our loot! Such was the excitement we were in.

This mom day was actually rather low key compared to days past. We managed to even keep to a "reasonable" dollar figure, (in a family of 7, "reasonable" has a different definition). It's a Sunday, and  Prince George is a big town but really... its not that big. We had a really hard time finding a flippin' restaurant that was open! The whole city, it seems, shuts down on Sunday! Except for the big box stores, apparently, and fast food places. We ended up settling for a food-court-esque Japanese place in what I'm pretty sure was PG's version of a "ghetto".

As soon as we got to the restaurant, I realized it had been hours since I pee'd, so I decided to go find the ladies room. Little did I know it was in freaking Narnia. There's a door proclaiming the washrooms are behind it, its locked, I turn the dead bolt and there's a hallway with an arrow pointing down it, followed by more arrows around several other corners. I'm pretty sure this whole block was just a series of buildings all connected by this hallway, because it was huge, and there were doors with labels for other stores that we had passed by on the street. So I use the potty, finally, by now I'm all sweaty from my trek, and hopelessly turned around without even the sun or stars to navigate by (yeah right!). I eventually make it back trough the maze of hallways to find that the original dead bolted door is dead bolted again! Aaaannd I'm stuck.

Remember all those doors to other stores along the way? Remember the fact that its Sunday and everything is closed? Yeah I'm stuck stuck. Eventually I find an exit door that I'm terrified will let out this screeching "SHE"S A THIEF!" alarm as soon as I open it. It doesn't. I emerge from the alley back on the street to find that I'm down the block and around the corner from the restaurant.... Narnia,. I'm telling you.

Also I drove the wrong way down a one-way street and had a burly man in a truck yell at me.... I've obviously been living in the bush about 7 months too long.

Aside from that, it was a pretty typical Mom Day. After we unloaded all our booty at home, we settled into watch 19 Kids and Counting. Don't laugh! They honestly have some good ideas for managing large households! I watch it for educational purposes..... That led to an argument about whether the early months of our dating could technically be considered a "courtship"... Again, it was educational.

Next Mom Day we are planning on taking the whole fan-damn-ly with us the night before and getting a hotel with a pool and just having fun. Then Dad can take all the kids home with him in the morning and we can commence bliss time.

The lovely children we get to escape from :)

More things I've learned since moving to the ranch:
6) When sheep get in the garage, its only funny 'til you realized that sheep have no concept of "potty training".
7) If you're afraid of mice and you're moving to a ranch, you're going to have a bad time.

Chaps vs. Chaps

**DISCLAIMER!: I love my partner very much...**

So my darling partner and I have been having this long running "disagreement", let say. He agrees to let me think I'm right, I agree to frequently tell him he's wrong. He is under the impression that "chaps" (you know, those super delightful bits of cowboy attire that go over their jeans and graciously show off all the yummy parts....man-lovers, you know what I'm talking about ;) are pronounced "SH-aps". Something about it being derived from the french word SH-blah-blah, etc etc and just not "CH-aps". It's sad and misguided, I agree.

So for perhaps a little over a year now, circumstances come about where this argument resurfaces and we hash it out all over again. Somehow, he has also managed to delude his parents, and draw them over the "shappy" darkside. It's a conspiracy I tell you!

All the while, I end up looking like the naive moron because I have no one to back me up, and he has his whole family! Who, incidentally, find my immersion into this life style hilarious, and therefore appreciate (and I suspect perpetuate...) circumstances when my (questionable!) ignorance is on display.

**Also, my in-laws are pretty awesome people as well whom I care about very much...**

Either way, when he's in his chaps/shaps I don't really care what their proper name is! I'm not usually coherent at that point anyways...

I wish I had a picture of that chappy loveliness to share with you. For now enjoy this picture of two beautiful people :P

So You're a Redneck Now...

It has been 6 months 20 days since I left the big city life behind me to live 1 hour outside of civilization, 63 km of unpaved road, into the country - to a lifestyle that has awakened me to my utter ignorance...

Things I have learned since moving to the ranch:
1. Cows are not as cute as you think.
2. Lambs are even cuter than you think.
3. Dogs are great, when you don't have 13 of them.
4. A romantic date will now include chopping firewood together.
5. That innocent mud puddle is probably not that innocent.

Were I to sum up the last 6.5 months in one word it would be exhaustion. Who knew ranching was so much work? Don't you just throw hay at some mindless beasts and they grow into tasty burgers, or something? Let me tell you, your grocery store is lying to you!

These past 11 days, the hubby has been across country, visiting old friends and going to a nation-wide sheep "show & shine"... And we have been tasked with keeping up with his very basic of daily chores. (In truth, it's only a fraction of them). We're feeding 13 dogs, walking dogs morning and night, and checking on sheep, who incidentally, have this nasty habit of dying rather easily. These 3 easy tasks take ALL DAMN morning. We start around 9am, end around noon. As well as keeping kids fed and unmaimed.  Then, and only then, can we get on to our regular full time jobs and responsibilities.

Its surprisingly brutal. Initially, I thought "Yeah this will be great! Start my day off with some fresh air, a little exercise and than wind my day down with a little fresh air and light exercise". About mid way through day 3 was when my enthusiasm started to wear thin. First, let me start off by saying cow dogs s-u-c-k. Period. Especially cow dogs who pretend to love you but who are really only loyal to their lord and master. It took them all of 4 minutes to realize that it was I who was supervising them and not their almighty. "Yeah, she kind of smells like him, but she's not him.... Wanna go sniff bushes for 4 hours?" Any love for dogs I may have had, has died over these last few days.

My enthusiasm for sheep had never been great to begin with, so no great loss there. Although we did have the very last lamb of the season born a couple days ago. So absurdly cute! I think I'll name him Bloomer (short for Late Bloomer), considering he was late by almost a month!

Cows are apparently generally self sufficient this time of the year, so we lucked out there.

Things I never, ever, ever thought I'd do in my whole entire life:
1) Keep a cows prolapsed uterus inside her with the toe of my shoe while helping to stitch her vagina closed,
2) Bath a dog in apple cider vinegar, repeatedly, for months.
3) Try to revive a lamb by dipping it in a water trough,
4) Help pull a calf  with a huge hand operated harness & pulley system thing,
5) Watch the person I love don shoulder length plastic gloves.....

It's been a whirlwind of emotion, insecurity, and physical incapability, topped off with a steep, steep learning curve. It's funny though, despite everything, I have yet to have a moment of true regret. I look back on what my life was, and sure there are some aspects I do miss, but for the most part that life seems like a very distant hazy dream.

It seems like every day comes with some new "you'll never believe what I just did!" adventure. Hence, this blog. It just too funny not to share with someone!